Balancing on the Identity Tightrope

Do you sometimes feel like your efforts, thoughts and identity are unbalanced, like something negative occurs in one area of life and everything revolves around that event? Sometimes maintaining a stable identity can seem to be as precarious as balancing on a tightrope. If you are anything like me, it can be so easy to get knocked off balance and be consumed, negatively overthinking in one area of life. Not only can this be draining, but it also can take away from other relationships, commitments, and other important parts of our lives.

Something that can be helpful to combat this unbalance is to remind ourselves that one event or part of our life does not define us. We are made up of and involved in multiple areas; our thought life, our emotional life, our career life, our personal relationships, our spiritual life, our physical health are just some of the many experiences and contributors to who we are. When we take the time to think about these different aspects of us, it can have the effect of taking us out of the mindset that one decision or event determines our destiny. Instead of hyper-focusing on the one event, we are able to see a broader picture of ourselves.

Not only are we are made up of different areas, but these areas are also interconnected, meaning that if we invest positive or negative energy in one area it may have the effect of influencing other areas. Hence, why one negative event can cause us to feel like our whole life or identity is negative. But, there’s also some good news to this phenomenon. Like I said, investing positive energy in one area can also positively influence other areas. So for example, if you are feeling down about something that occurred in your relationships, investing some positive energy in your physical health or career or spiritual area can positively affect your overall sense of identity, thus positively affecting the wounded relationship area.

A way that can help us reflect upon and visualize this concept is by taking time to write these things out. I tend to grasp things better when they are presented visually as well as in an auditory manner, so I often use visual aids when I work with my clients. Here is my quickly drawn example; I have listed some of the different areas that I believe make up me and I have listed actions I can take to positively invest in these, along with drawing lines between the bubbles to illustrate the interconnectedness of everything. Holistic Self List Example with positive actions

We all feel unbalanced at times, but taking a small amount of time to remind ourselves of our whole self can ground our steps and help us walk across the tightrope safely.  What are some other ways you all rebalance yourselves?